Pillars of Happiness

People who know me know I smile a lot. I’m generally of a cheerful disposition, and strive to improve the day of anyone that’s around me. This does not, however, translate to always being happy. What someone is feeling inside is often not what is reflected on the outside. This is important to understand about ourselves as well as others. I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about and working towards behaviors that improve my “%Happy” (this is my engineering geek way to think about it). I’ve defined three behavior pillars that, for me, guide my path to true happiness.

Adaptability. Have you noticed people who “go with the flow” tend to always seem more at peace? They just let worries slide off of them and allow life to flow around them. I am NOT wired this way by nature. I am analytical, driven and stubborn. I have learned throughout my life, however, to have a general approach that all situations can be made into a positive. To seek out the good and let the bad go. To allow myself to grow when pushed to the max instead of fighting to stay where I’m at. This basic response to challenges has allowed me to stay optimistic and find happiness even in times of genuine sorrow. Right now the challenges seem to just keep coming, so my challenge is to keep finding the opportunity in the strife. Always adapting with a growth attitude.

Gratitude. Many, many articles have been written on the importance of gratitude in our lives. There are always more things we would like to have, more experiences we would like to create, more power we would like to hold. Taking time to be truly grateful for the people and things that enrich our lives is very therapeutic. I’ve written about how wonderful it was to visit my family after being in quarantine for months. For me my dear family, friends, strong body and sharp mind are things I vow to never take for granted. Being grateful for them really keeps everything else in perspective.

Grace. Wow, this one is a big one for me right now! What in the world is going on in the world?! I’ve long believed that everyone has a right to their own beliefs and that this is something that make the world interesting. Right now, however, there is a lot of conflict and arguments over what opinion is right. Emotional arguments are rarely constructive in my experience. So I propose grace. One of my good friends thanked me one day for showing her grace when she was struggling. It was so powerful to hear her say that, and really struck a cord with me. Show grace, allow mistakes, forgive transgressions, move forward.

Adaptability. Gratitude. Grace. Try them out and let me know if you notice an increase in your %Happy!